Going The Wong Way

Indebted

In today’s world, there is a high priority placed on independence and individuality. I know that I value this in myself and in others.

While some think that fellowship and community are important, it seems to me that there is a distinctly positive association with being able to think and act of one’s own accord. In the workplace, this is obviously true because any employer would want someone who can figure out what’s wrong and solve something on their own without their manager’s every guiding instruction. But even outside of the workplace people like to see people who will help without being asked, not have to be told what to do every step of the way, and can come up with new ideas on their own.

Perhaps in this Randian society where man is elevated to the heroic nature that he is, we have gone even further such that our value system has become more sharply focused. That is, instead of praising society, we praise the individual.

As a Christian, though, I shouldn’t have such a high regard for the things that each of us can do on our own. I should feel indebted.

Christianity, at its roots, holds the message that we have something that we have done zero work for. The work that Jesus Christ did on the cross has made my sin null and void. And that is a wonderful thing! So while I can still appreciate independence in action, I need to always remember that ultimately I cannot hold it against others when they do not. For what do I hold over them? Nothing. I should forgive my debts, for I am forgiven mine.

Confusing Addresses

For those that have ever driven in areas that are unfamiliar, I’m sure that you can sympathize with my distaste for confusing addresses.

The thing is, it’s so unnecessary! Why must city planners do things like:

• Same name but differing suffixes (e.g., Boulevard, Street, and Circle)
• Same number for multiple prefixes (e.g., 111 North Main St and 111 South Main St)
• Non-numerical order. This can happen sometimes when changing cities. And it’s no good!
• Non-standard street behavior. I’m talking about the one way street, the blocking island in the road that restricts cars from entering roads from certain directions, or even a strange break in the road!
• Buildings where you can’t see the address numbers! Alright so maybe it’s more the fault of the builders of each building. But still, it’s annoying.

I am Derek, therefore I rant. Haha. So will city planners listen? Doubtful, indeed.

Obviously my deal with it is that I don’t like getting lost. Who really does?

Ignorance =? Bliss

People sure seem to like to talk about themselves being ignorant. But just go and call someone ignorant and see what happens.

I’ve heard it said that being called ignorant is tops for bad things to be called. Now whether that is a true statement remains to be seen. Still it makes me wonder. Is the saying true? Is ignorance bliss?

When people talk about ignorance as a blissful state, they are usually talking about the fact that they are unaware of something. Perhaps it’s because they’ve been caught doing something that they’re not supposed to be doing (e.g., breaking the law because they didn’t know the law). Or perhaps it’s because it’s their last resort reasoning for why they aren’t caught up on the facts (e.g., people not up on things like politics).

But it doesn’t seem altogether like I have to buy ignorance as an excuse. Do I really care if someone didn’t know that it was illegal to yield to me at a signal when they’ve just caused an accident? No, frankly ignorance as an excuse is useless. Facts are facts.

So is it bliss? Maybe. But it sure is an extraordinarily weak argument/excuse/cop-out no matter why you’re saying it.

Driving ~ Playing The Stock Market

Lots of people drive. Although perhaps we should rethink the way that we do it, what with the amount of money we’re sinking into our traveling. While there is much to think about (least of all are my Tips For Saving Gas), you can also find lessons that aren’t initially obvious. And by you, I mean me.

Driving everyday to work has taught me a few things. One thing that I’ve recently noticed is how it seems to me that I need to just chill when I’m driving. That is, it does no good to constantly switch lanes in order to try to get ahead. While I may get ahead a little bit, just a single wrong choice, and I’ve lost all that I’ve worked so hard to get.

So it is with stocks as well.

• Fairly common advice is that you should buy for the long term. The extra stress, work, and volatility are said to just not be worth it. That is, you could do all of that work and still end up at the same place as someone who just set it and left it. And that definitely happens to people when they’re switching lanes trying to get around all of the other people. It’s perhaps even more noticeable since a good deal of the road that I drive is 2 lanes.
• Don’t be shocked if something abruptly happens to you. If you’re going someplace and you need to be on time, isn’t it always better to be early and prepared rather than cutting it as close as possible? That way, if something happens, you’ll have some leeway to recover. And don’t you dare go putting all over your money into 1 stock. Or even all of your money into stocks!
• Notice patterns. When driving the same route everyday, I start to get a sense of how things are. That is, some lanes are more apt to progress more quickly because of the traffic flow. And I start to notice how lights are set up so I know whether it’s worth it to bust my butt to make the light. Alright so maybe that’s hard to make into some lesson for stocks because the whole deal with the stock market is that people are trying to predict what companies are going to do. And it’s only partially based on past performance. Still, take that past into account when doing your stock-picking thing.

The comparison doesn’t hold up completely, of course. While you don’t have to buy stocks, you do have to pick a lane to drive in. But you know what? I’m not concerning myself with making a perfect comparison.

Relationship Games

An easy way to differentiate between people that are young and old are how they deal with relationships. Even more important than their years (after all age is just a number) is the maturity with which they handle things.

So what do people do? They play games. What are games? They are things like:

• Girls saying no when they actually mean yes


Courtesy of Flickr user *Karla*

• Guys not wanting to express how they actually feel because it’s not “manly”
• Similarly guys pretending to be completely uninterested
• Girls playing hard to get (when they actually do want the pursuer to “catch” them)
• Both reading into all kinds of actions, lack of actions, subtle tones, sly looks, the way they laugh when you’re around, and all manner of intricacies that I do not have knowledge of
• A girl leading a guy (or vice versa) to think that a relationship might happen at some future time

When we play these games, it’s all smoke and mirrors. And if the goal of relationships is marriage, then how is that helpful in accomplishing that goal? It’s not.

Guys need to ask the girl out, straight up. (I had my fun being sarcastic about it On Asking A Girl Out by saying what you should not be doing.) But you need to make it crystal clear to her what you want and what you’re doing. Otherwise you’re just beating around the bush and wasting everyone’s time.

Girls need to act purposefully. You want him? Go with it if he asks you out. You don’t? Tell him the truth, brutal as it might be. Don’t sugarcoat things because that helps nobody.

These things don’t just apply to the chase, do they? I’m not even really sure why they would apply more specifically to guy/girl relationships. All I know is that I see it there more often. However, these thoughts and their ramifications could be generalized to cover any type of relationship with anyone.